May 12, 2012


Today is Birthmother's Day! I felt like today needed a special post. We want people to know that our most recent experiences do not reflect upon Birthmothers as a whole. In fact, the woman that hurt us never really earned that title. I tried to write a post that explained how I felt, but I just couldn't get it quite right. I realized that the only way for you to truly see how amazing Birthmoms are, is for you to hear from one directly. Cassie was gracious (and nervous!) to abide and I think her words are beautiful and perfect for today. I've had people ask me some strange and assuming questions about our relationship and I think after reading this you'll see why we choose open adoption. We love her.   

Being a Birthmom

Hi, I'm Cassie. I am Isla's birthmom. Kindle asked me to write a little blog post on what being a birthmom means to me. At first, I told her no way. Then I started thinking about what it feels like to be Isla's birthmom. First of all, I love LOVE being Isla's birthmom. She is the sweetest, most amazing little angel. I also love Isla's birth story and knowing that I had a part in delivering her to Ben and Kindle. What a miracle! We still laugh about the seemingly random sequence of events that brought us together. My favorite part about that is knowing none of it was random at all. Becoming Isla's birthmom has been my greatest blessing. It's also something I'm really proud of. For me, being a birthmom has changed my life in every way possible. Isla is most definitely on my mind every day. There are times when I literally find myself lost in thoughts of her. Some days are hard, most are great. Becoming a birthmom wasn't something I planned.  Would I take it back? Not for anything in the world. I love Ben and Kindle with all of my heart. I loved them before I met them. They have also helped me through the hardest time of my life. While I knew I was going to place Isla, I still dealt with grief. And oh man, was it ugly. Ben and Kindle saw the ugly times and still supported and loved me. Even in my grief and hard days, I knew Isla was where she is supposed to be. As a birthmom, I have met a lot of other birthmoms. Women of all ages, from all backgrounds that have also been a part of something amazing. Birthmoms are incredible. Hands down. I love being a part of this community and making it public that birthmoms are normal women. The stigma associated with birthmom isn't flattering. Nor is it the norm. We are typically over 20, educated, and drug free. We have jobs and supportive families. We place for the benefit of our babies. Not because we are unable to raise a child. In a perfect world, everyone would know that. Until then, I am going to advocate adoption (for Kindle!!!!) and I am going to support every birthmom. 
I love Isla with every bone in my body. I would do anything in the world for her. I love her face. I love her laugh and I looooove that she calls me Cass. I am so happy to be a part of her life. To watch her grow and learn and celebrate her life. She is a part of my life that I cherish. As is every memory of her. Love you Isla G. Forever and ever. Ben and Kindle, I love you both. Thank you for the prayers and constant blessings. 

A tribute to Kindle for Mother's Day. 
Dear Kindle, 
Thank you for your support. Thank you for being the most amazing mommy to Isla and teaching her everything she knows (shes a super kid!). Thank you for your random wolf emails, yummy dinners, perfect haircuts, text messages at the absolute right time, funny stories, and being my friend. Thank you for marrying Ben. He is the greatest daddy to little Isla G. I am sorry for your losses. I wish I could do anything to fix it. Again, thank you. You have been more generous and open than I ever would have imagined. (Or wanted? ha!) You have included me in so much. My gratitude can never be expressed in words. Kindle, I think you are the greatest. I am so excited for the blessings headed your way. Stay strong sister! Happy Mother's Day!! 

Thank you Cassie! 


  1. Oh my gosh! You both are amazing women! Thanks for sharing.

  2. Oh Cassie, I love you so much! To watch the example that you and Kindle have set before the world of two women coming together, fearlessly, to put Isla first...It's amazing. You two are the embodiment of what adoption should be. Happy Birthmother's day to you, and Happy Mother's day to you Kindle. I love you both.

  3. We love you Cassie! We love you Ben & kindle! We love you Isla! Words fail me right now as I am pondering how amazing this whole process has been. So much strength and love!!!!!!

  4. You are BOTH incredible women! Cassie, Thank you for bringing Isla into this world for Ben and Kindle! I have only met her once but know that Ben and Kindle are the best parents! Kindle, I sure do miss you and know that SOON another baby will be privileged to call you mom! Thank you for posting this! Happy Mother's Day!

  5. Cassie, that was such a beautiful post. Thank you! My sister placed her little girl for adoption 4 years ago and we have an open adoption that sounds very similar to the one you have with Kindle and Ben. I love it and them! I have custody of my sisters other two biological children and have had them for 7 years and I can't tell you how valuable our open adoption with their little sister has been to their emotional well being. We love the Johnsons! We camp together, barbeque together, celebrate birthdays together etc...It's like we are best friends and relatives at the same time. Little Marin will never wonder if her birth family love her, she knows we do!

  6. Oh my - - tears ! You are both such perfect examples of true and pure charity and selfless love. YOu are both so amazing. God bless - -